Sexuality: How Bad is the “Generation Porn” really?

Child disability insurance is important

Whichever product parents choose, they should definitely set up the deposit or savings plan in the child’s name, Lischke adds: "Then you can apply the savings tax of 801 euros for the interest income." And even if saving for their children is important to many parents, they should not neglect other important precautionary elements. According to Nauhauser, this includes, for example, children’s disability insurance.

Just save without debt

In addition, families should first reduce debts before they start saving: "Often the parents still pay off the loan for the house and at the same time put money aside for the children" is an experience of the consumer advocate. Because of the spread between loan and savings interest, this does not make economic sense: "This is then a saving for the child on credit."

Premature, hypersexualized, addicted to online sex films and incapable of partnerships – this is the much discussed and criticized one "Generation porn" worries parents so much. But is that also a social reality? For the seventh time now, the opinion research institute Emnid has carried out the study on behalf of the Federal Center for Health Education "Youth sexuality" Interviewed teenagers between 14 and 17 years old and their parents on the subject of education, sexuality and contraception. The result of the current survey paints a picture of today’s youth that clearly contradicts the impressions conveyed by the media.

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Teenagers are safer than ever before

German girls and boys have her "first time" later and are generally less sexually active than in 2005. This is based on the study "Youth sexuality 2010" emerged. Afterwards, the young people are not only more cautious, but also more cautious: They use contraception more safely than ever before. Many even use the pill and condom at the same time to avoid pregnancy and illness, said the director of the Federal Office, Elisabeth Pott at the presentation of the study in Berlin. Around 3,500 young people were surveyed in 2009, including around 1,000 teenagers with a migration background. In some cases there were clear differences between the two groups.

Adolescents later sexually active

Both German young people and those from migrant families are sexually less active. In 2005, ten percent of 14-year-old boys in Germany had had sexual intercourse; at the time of the current survey, it was only four percent. For girls, the proportion was only seven instead of the previous twelve percent. In 2005, 73 percent of 17-year-old girls had had sexual intercourse. In 2009, only 66 percent said they had already had sex. According to the study, 66 percent of 17-year-old men had already had sex in 2005; in 2009, 65 percent said this was also the case.

According to the study, boys from migrant families are sexually active earlier and more frequently than their German peers. In 2009, ten percent of 14-year-olds said they had already had sex. In 2005, however, it was significantly more (29 percent.) In 2009, a total of 72 percent of 17-year-olds had sexual experiences. In the 2005 survey it was 79 percent. Girls with a migration background, on the other hand, are much more cautious and justify this by being too young. In 2009, only a good half of those questioned (53 percent) of the 17-year-olds had sex. In 2005 it was 55 percent.

Generation porn? "The best generation in a long time"

Most young people cited the lack of the right partner and their own shyness as reasons for their reluctance. "The desire for trust is very great" said Pott. When it comes to intercourse, it is usually in a committed relationship. In a society that is characterized by a high degree of flexibility and mobility, the need for a stable, trusting partnership seems to be growing ever greater.

So it is not surprising when Klaus Farin from "Archive of youth cultures" in Berlin even from "the best generation in a long time" speaks. The expert for youth scenes observes that young people today are not only more reserved sexually. Juvenile delinquency and cigarette and drug consumption are also falling. Instead, among other things, more teenagers are politically active than before.

Elisabeth Pott apparently sees it similarly: When asked about the brutalized "Generation porn" she explains that although there are individual cases, these are by no means representative of the masses. The book was published almost two years ago "Germany’s sexual tragedy" in which the youth pastor Bernd Siggelkow reported on the sexual neglect of German youth. However, given the latest numbers, the chances of such a sexual tragedy appear to be quite small.

The young people are mainly informed by their parents, but increasingly also by school. At least three quarters of adolescents say that their knowledge of sexuality, reproduction ashley madison advertising and contraception came from class – no other source is cited more often. "The one-time shameful educational talk from earlier is finally over" emphasizes Elisabeth Pott. Boys in particular also use the Internet to fill knowledge gaps.

Sexual violence

Shocking nonetheless: Almost every fifth girl (19 percent) with a migrant background has already experienced sexual violence. And 13 percent of the German girls also reported situations in which they had to defend themselves against unwanted sexual assault.

Little Paul and his parents Thomas and Maren (names changed) look like a normal young family. The two-year-old laughs shyly, Thomas holds him lovingly in his arms and Maren stands happily by. But Paul is a special child: he came about through a sperm donation from a strange man – so Thomas is not the biological father. This is no problem for the 27-year-old: "I love him above everything else" says Thomas and adds: "To me he’s like my own child."

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For many couples the burden is too great

Around 1000 children are born in Germany every year as a result of treatment with donor sperm. About 50 of them are created in Dr. Robert Emig in Mainz. The reproductive medicine specialist has been helping couples or single women have children since 2004. Often it is already simple procedures such as cycle monitoring that lead to the desired result. But in some cases more complex therapies are unavoidable. "This is very stressful for many couples. Some people quickly lose their nerve and give up" reports Emig.

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"As a man you feel very weak"

For Thomas and Maren, too, the decision in favor of the donor sperm was tough. After several unsuccessful attempts at artificial insemination with Thomas’ semen, they were deeply depressed. "You get totally broken inside" explains Maren. After many long discussions, they finally decided on a sperm donor. Not easy for Thomas: "As a man you feel very weak at first" he reports. But in the end, the desire to have children was decisive. "We really wanted to have a real family" says Maren.

As tall as possible, blond, sporty and intelligent

In this way they created a profile that the donor should fulfill as far as possible. Eye color, hair color, height – these were the essential requirements. "Some couples give us a picture of the man and want someone who is musically gifted, athletic and academic" tells Emig. The larger the requirement profile, the more difficult the search is. Hereditary diseases are largely excluded through surveys and examinations. But for the time being, a lot remains hidden about the donor’s further identity.

Experts advise initiating the child as early as possible

Whether it stays that way depends above all on whether the parents tell their child about his true origin. Thomas and Maren don’t intend to do that. "We are afraid that Paul will turn away from us" explains Maren. In addition, both fear the rejection of their strictly Catholic families. "They would neither understand nor accept that" regrets Thomas.

A decision that the expert Petra Thorn does not recommend. The therapist advises many couples in such situations and recommends that the children be informed as early as possible. On the one hand, the secret could weigh heavily on the parents. On the other hand, if the child finds out about it by chance, the child suffers from identity crises and trauma. "It can also lead to a breach of trust with the parents" warns the expert.

"It is worth it!" Parents convinced of sperm donor therapy

Thorn estimates that currently only a third of parents tell their children about it. After the judgment of the Higher Regional Court in Hamm, which awarded a 21-year-old in a judgment at the beginning of February to be allowed to learn the identity of her biological father, Thorn hopes that more parents will find the courage to educate their children at an early age. "That is the best for everyone" thinks the therapist.

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Thomas and Maren are not yet convinced of this. But probably from the result of fertilization by donor sperm: Maren has just finished another treatment. The semen comes from the same donor as Paul’s. "Only now are we a real family" say the two and encourage couples to take the step in a similar situation: "It is worth it .. 100 percent!"

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At some point it hits all parents: the children – or actually they are already young people – begin to feel embarrassing about their mother or father. Things that were completely normal in family life up to now are suddenly uncomfortable for teenagers: looking over their shoulder while surfing the Internet, homemade cookies in the lunch box, mother’s red lipstick, father’s stupid jokes, kissing goodbye. Although all parents know that puberty is not far away, the negative behavior comes as a surprise to most.

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Smaller children are also ashamed

Even with smaller children it happens now and then that they are ashamed of their parents. The main motivation at this age is the desire to belong to a group and the fear of being excluded from the group due to conspicuous behavior on the part of the parents. Even with smaller children, it happens now and then that they are ashamed of their parents. The main motive at this age is the desire to belong to a group and the fear of being excluded from the group due to abnormal behavior on the part of the parents. It is particularly difficult for children between the ages of six and twelve when their parents’ behavior does not correspond to the norm in their environment.